Detachment is bliss
*First published via email on Wednesday, January 16, 2019. Click here to subscribe.
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Connecting with inner self has taken more conscious effort for me these last couple of days.
It's so easy to not want to, especially during the times when connecting would be the most helpful thing you could do.
This can happen when things are going bad, but also when things are going good.
Gay Hendricks, the author of The Big Leap calls this an "upper-limiting problem." When things are going well, there's an upper limit of happiness that eventually gets reached, and when that threshold is crossed, shit hits the fan. Has this ever happened to you before?
And whether we know it or not, the upper-limit problem is a form of self-sabotage. I guess that's the bad news. But the good news is that it is under our control to change.
Not that it's easy. But it's doable. And remembering that it's possible hopefully puts a little gleam in your eye. :)
So last week, I was checking out job listings every day, applying to ones that felt aligned and interesting to me, and was getting to a point where I genuinely felt excited about going back to work.
This week, all of that crashed and the old thoughts of, "I don't want to get a job just to have a job, just to pay endless bills, and just to get through life. What's the point of it all?" came flooding back.
I grudgingly got out of bed this morning and brought the dog inside so he wouldn't have to spend this wet and gray day alone. His name's Tommy.
And as I sat at the coffee table, staring out at the rain, with Tommy's warm body curled up next to me, I decided to put my fears and anxieties aside for just a moment. (Click here to connect with us on IG. 🐕)
I looked down at Tommy and marveled at how simple his life was and how he just decided to be happy and content all the time. Whether he was outside in the rain guarding our fence against intruders (read: mean-looking neighborhood cats and squirrelly squirrels) or inside the warm house curled at our feet, gently dozing off.
I looked out the window and appreciated the grey, drizzle outside and how green it allowed the grass in the park across the street to be. And I appreciated having central heating and a roof above my head.
In these moments of detaching from my worries and deciding to be in the present moment, I realized I was upper-lmiiting myself.
I've never had a job that I absolutely loved, so of course my ego would try its hardest to stop me from going through with getting a job. Of course it would kick up its protective measures and feed me all these thoughts that would stop be from continuing my job search.
In these soft, quiet moments of detaching and becoming present, I found the part of me that is always my calm, peaceful, present inner self.
I received a solid knowing that I will be happy as long as I continue growing and helping other people grow as well. I don't need to worry about the how.
It felt like a huge sigh of relief. And an opening of space in my heart, mind, and soul.
So even if you're not quite there yet with connecting with inner self, or your ego is fighting you and feeding you things like, "How is that going to help? How do we even know that it's inner self that we're listening to?" blah blah, give detachment a try.
Just look around you, find something, anything, that you like to look at. Whether it's your pen, your shoe, your keyboard, or a blade of grass. Make a conscious decision to just release the fear and anxiety that's gripping your mind so tightly right now...
And you'll notice that YOU are the one gripping tightly to fear and anxiety, NOT the other way around.
Enjoy that delicious feeling of letting go, and invite your inner self to come into mind and play.
Just for a moment.
A moment is all you need.
PS: In case you missed it, click here to listen to the latest podcast episode on the "5 Ways to Connect with Your Inner Self" for more ideas on connecting with your inner self.
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