people who get transformational results with Rapid Transformational Therapy
*First published via email on Wednesday, March 20, 2019. Click here to subscribe.
Hi [FIRST NAME GOES HERE],
It is 1:11pm and I just had a discussion over lunch with my mom about numerology. It's been a fun day that started with leading a group coaching call, interviewing my beautiful coach Bri, and then have a conversation about numerology and horoscopes with my mama. :)
Over the last few weeks, I've been getting more calls from potential clients (YAY!), and last week, I felt upset at myself after a few of them. They ran 3 times longer than my usual consultation calls and even though they said they wanted to work with me, I knew I wasn't a good fit but I wasn't able to say so. I basically stayed on the phone for an hour trying to convince them...or myself, really, that we were a good fit. And in the end, they didn't sign up.
And today, I'm so glad about that.
I'm clearly still learning my own boundaries for these consultation calls and for the specific clients I most ROCK at working with and then following through with sticking with them.
RTT and coaching is not a small investment. And I don't think it's fair for me to take on clients when I have the slightest feeling that they might not be a good fit. Because my intuition is always right. When I take on clients like this anyway, it ends up creating what feels like a bad experience and an expensive mistake for them, and a monthlong worrisome experience for me in which I constantly feel like I have to prove that RTT works.
I don't need to prove that RTT works. It freaking does. But only when someone's ready for it. Just like with anything else in life.
And if someone is not ready for it, I don't think it's my job to prove to them that they are or worse, that they should be. (Many marketing programs teach us to sell this way.)
I think it's my job to allow someone to not be ready for RTT or coaching and to then direct them towards something that will help them in the meantime, in the here and now.
In my OT career, I was taught that I had to bend myself in order to work with and be effective with all kinds of people. If I can't do that, I would be considered a bad therapist.
So the idea that I am not able to work well with everyone and that there are only specific kinds of people that I am really good at working with has felt...strange. It triggers my shame story, "I'm not good enough."
But after last week, I decided that I am going to feel great owning the fact that I only want to work with specific types of people because I am my best self with them.
And with my Mom's help, I created a list of characteristics of potential clients that indicate that we are NOT a good fit, meaning they would NOT get the HUGE transformation they want out of working with me. These are people who:
Only want a safe space to vent (I recommend talk therapy - it's done wonders for me! And insurance often covers it. :D)
Want to stick to their stories and self-beliefs that are keeping them where they're at (I recommend journaling and affirmations for now.)
Are persistently pessimistic
Want help but are unwilling to or cannot pay for it (because I do my best work when my bills are paid on time)
And then of course, I created a list of characteristics of the people who would get TRANSFORMATIONAL results from working with me. These are people who:
Struggle with people-pleasing and worrying about what other people think about them
Struggle with feeling lost and not knowing who they are, easily swayed by other people's opinions
Have a hard time saying no or setting healthy boundaries
Have already tried other methods of healing and they haven't worked or they haven't worked fast enough
Are generally friendly and optimistic
Trust me and are willing to dive into the unknown in order to transform themselves
Say, "I always see the good in people" when asked why they're awesome
Say things like, "I don't know what's wrong with me but I need to fix it, and I don't care what needs to happen. I'm ready to do it. I'm all in."
And examples of some of the results clients have gotten when they match the above characteristics include:
Feeling deeply connected with their Future Self
Making massive, sustained changes in their thinking, feeling, and action patterns to match their Future Self
Turning to their immense amount of Inner Wisdom for answers instead of looking outside of themselves for it
Feeling solid in who they truly are, becoming "unfuckwithable"
Setting boundaries with calm confidence
Feeling peacefully detached even during high-energy and high-emotion situations
Feeling a sense of inner peace, calm, and freedom to do what they want to do and be who they want to be
I think these are pretty comprehensive lists. It lights me up from the inside out imagining the person who is a good match on the other end of the phone.
And again, this does not mean at all that the people who fall under the "NOT" list are not good people or that you're "not good enough" to work with me. I have the same amount of tremendous love, honor, and respect for you. I just know that you won't get what you are wanting by working with me, and you deserve to have what you want. :)
So I'm putting these lists out into the Universe, and I will continue to practice sticking with these boundaries during my consultation calls.
And so it is. :) I'll let you guys know how it goes.
PS: Of course, if you are taking a look at the second list above (I'll call it the Transformational List), saying, "That's me!" I invite you to book a 15 minute consultation call with me here! We will use the call to talk about what you're looking for help with, and if it's something I can help you with and it's a good match for both of us, I can share with you how. :)
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